4 words: hood of his car
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
