so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Randomize
