pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize