used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize