I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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