David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
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