I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
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