I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
