I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
