So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
