its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
