OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Randomize
