I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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