Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
