My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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