I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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