careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
