oh god the rape fog is back!
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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