He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
