she looked like the before picture.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
