That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
