He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
