is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
