Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
