sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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