there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
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