Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
