you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
