Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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