I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize