i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
