You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
