My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Randomize
