everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize
