This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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