Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Do you remember whose house we're in?
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
