I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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