I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
MIDGETS
????
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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