can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Randomize
