I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
