If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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