Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
