some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize