I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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