So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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