piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
