I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
True but thats because hes a fetus.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize