You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Where did you get a picture of my penis
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
