um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize
