If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I'm sobbing to NWA
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
