these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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