UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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