Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
is this the sara with the beer cane?
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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